I stepped outside this morning to turn off our Christmas lights. Given the time change, it was still dark, but I saw the school bus scooting off after picking up the neighborhood kiddos. It must have been about 6:30 a.m., a bit chilly with that yummy crisp air. I returned to my house, and our guard dog was still sleeping; I guess he is on duty during business hours. My husband had already left for work; he had an early start, but most importantly, I saw our daughter, eight years old, still sleeping.
I love the mornings; they are my most productive time, but I can not imagine stepping back into the hustle and bustle. Homeschooling was not always how we educated our child; our daughter was in daycare and private school ages 3 to 5. My husband and I cut back on many extras to send our daughter to the best school within our budget. With the help of Dave Ramsey, Financial Peace Course, we were able to make it all work. However, we still did not have that peace we were looking for. On paper, things seemed right, but there was still tension.
Both of us are very driven people; balancing work and home life was hard. I am the kind of gal who would work earlier, later, weekends; you name it, I was there! My husband is cut from the same fabric. Therefore, it was the tension of pickup and drop-offs, who was calling in sick to work if our daughter wasn’t feeling well.
Nothing prepares you for the change parenthood brings, but with God’s decrement and letting peace be our umpire, He had led our family toward homeschooling.
Aside from the money it costs to send our daughter to private school, it takes away precious family time. We realized my income was paying for school; we were outsourcing our daughter’s education. Both of us were at work all day, sometimes employing aftercare, and it seemed that our time together was getting shorter and shorter. I am no stranger to working long hours, and there is a time and place for it. All arrows directed us to a lifestyle change.
“You can do all things but not all at the same time.” – Suzanne Venker
After many conversations, we decided I would homeschool, and my husband would continue advancing his career. I do not think our marriage would be what it is today if we had not made a change.
That brings me to the chief idea of the five reasons we chose and still choose to homeschool.
- It is the best education we can give our daughter.
Before we decided to homeschool – a parent who homeschooled four children over 18-plus years said, “The most important thing is giving your child the best education you can.”
Let it be the best you can, whether it’s public school, private school, or homeschooling. I am grateful for living in a country that allows us to homeschool; it is natural to do so, but I digress. Let’s keep going.
I want to give you a little more context on how we arrived at homeschooling being our best form of education. It was not easy for me to leave my career, or at least leave it for now.
When I was pregnant with our daughter, I thought I would have a baby and then return to “my” life as I knew it. I was not prepared for how motherhood would change me. It was a slow, sometimes painful process; I say that in the best way, although it may sound otherwise.
From my eight-plus years of experience as a mother, I have learned that love for your child grows and grows. Becoming a mother changed my life, and I no longer felt my passion for my work. I had a new purpose and passion: motherhood. Someone wise once said old habits are hard to break. So, that go-getter, career-driven gal I was was not easy to leave.
However, I started to hear that still, quiet voice, not audible but one that speaks to your heart. That intuition, that discernment – my husband should be the sole provider, but I was not listening to that. It just did not make sense in my rational thinking. I reasoned myself right out of the idea that we could live on one income. I also was not ready to make some financial changes, which meant saying “no” to all the extras.
I had worked well since I was old enough to start, probably well before I should have started. We grew up with very little, so if you wanted something, you had to go out there and earn it! I kept on that hard-working trajectory the entire time, right up until my 40s. It was a school of thought that was deeply woven into me.
I did not obey the prompting to leave my job. I did, however, cut back on hours. I took another job for the second time, demoting myself in pay and skill, so I had more time for drop-offs and pickups with our daughter. I worked from home only during the hours our daughter was at school. I was now able to participate in all the school activities. It was at this time that I was able to unpack the curriculum.
At this point, I realized I could teach her all of this and more! I could also use our time more productively. Changing classrooms, student-teacher ratios, and logistics cause a lot of time to be lost in school. With that, we decided I would homeschool and no longer outsource it.
- We have autonomy and the freedom to choose curriculum.
As time passes, I value freedom; I hold it as the highest virtue. I also believe that freedom is a prerequisite to virtue because virtue requires the freedom to make moral choices. I will circle back on moral choices and values on point number 3.
Back to autonomy and the freedom to choose curricula. In my first year of homeschooling, I was as nervous as any other parent. I mean, what is more important than our children’s education? I thought all the thoughts that any other momma would think: Can I do this? Where do I start? Will our daughter thrive? How will I build community/friends? Will she be prepared for the world?
So, I started at the best point I could, using the same curriculum that the private school she went to used.
I dotted every “i” and crossed every “t.” My daughter did every single math problem, worksheet, and test written in her workbooks. I mean a straight-A student by schooling standards.
During this time, I was connecting with other homeschoolers. Here, I discovered the Charlotte Mason Six-Volume Series. This series turned my world upside down regarding education, parenting, and living! I never looked at education the same. The curriculum that we were using was good, but it was meant to teach larger groups; I also found it dry and redundant.
I began implementing the Charlotte Mason Philosophy using Ambleside online, so I didn’t abandon what we were doing midyear.
The Charlotte Mason way of teaching is well-rounded, nutritious, rich in content, and values the learning of virtues.
This is not a direct plug for the Charlotte Mason Philosophy. It is a plug for homeschooling. Parents choose what is best for their children. No curriculum is perfect, but you have the autonomy to select one or combine a few.
If God gave us the ability and mind to birth and rear a child, He must have given us the resources and mind to teach our children and prepare them for the world.
“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6
- Values and Virtues
Many people say, “They” should teach this or that in school. I am guilty of saying the same statement. However, as time passes, I believe everything regarding values and character is taught at home. A simple example is finances; how often have you heard someone say, “They” should teach about finances in school?
I would argue this is a value; how people choose to spend their money is an indication of what they value. Outsourcing such important life skills no longer sits well with me. Who better can teach a child than the parent? Who will care more about their children’s well-being than parents?
Of course, not all people want or can homeschool, but supplementing at home perhaps is an option and can be done at low or no cost. There are many resources!
Virtues, such as moral code, absolutes, and significant questions of life, are taught at home. During the formative years, there is less noise on these topics when homeschooling. Confusing a child developmentally is not ideal and potentially harmful.
Whether we are consciously aware of it or not, our children are sponges and pick up all the small details of how we live and what we value. Therefore, sending our children out into the world at an early age might mean we are working against ourselves. Selecting a curriculum that aligns with our values and building a community with shared values sets the stage for a good foundation. The circle is curated, giving less access to our growing children.
- The Goodness of Homeschooling
The noble work of discipleship and parenthood is fulfilling if we lean into it. More often than not, I see a culture outsourcing the major duties of family life and parenthood. I humbly say this: I give all the glory to God for changing my mindset and opening the doors to homeschooling.
I personally know how easy it is to get looped in and do things the same way they have always been done. I have also, at times, moved in tandem with culture, but we have been challenged to step outside the line and walk alongside the others, taking a less traveled path. It has been well worth it!
During the first year of homeschooling, we purchased an all-in-one curriculum for about $500. As I mentioned earlier, mid-year, I began to change the philosophy of how and what I teach. Therefore, as I started implementing the Charlotte Mason Philosophy using Ambleside online, I got all our books from the library. I learned that the local library can teach an entire education for free. It is not entirely free; we pay taxes for it, but you get the idea. Another point I may add is that we can budget for piano classes and golf by not paying for private school or aftercare.
If you are thinking about homeschooling and feel a call to it, its goodness far exceeds the preconceived notions. Seeking the best education for our children will lead us to make sound decisions.